02.21.2002 - Irrational Exuberance

Just as I walked out the door this morning, I mused to myself about how today would be the first time I had driven my own car to work in about a week. I had just replaced the faulty tires yesterday and it seemed like everything would be in order to carry me through to the end of the month when I would officially have the van. I felt ready and happy to have a last fling with my first car. You can imagine the volume and quantity of expletives pouring from my frost covered windows when I turned the ignition and only heard a faint click. The bitch isn't starting again.

So after much screaming and kicking of said new tires, I retreated to my apartment where I called my office to let my boss know I would be late and tried to figure out what the hell I could do. After some deliberation, I decided to call Mr. Bestfriendinthewholewideworld. He offered to let me borrow his car for the weekend in exchange for dropping him off at the Airport tonight. I figured that, aside from being jarred from sleep at an unnaturally early hour, he wouldn't mind too much if I asked to borrow the car a few hours early. Thankfully, I was right.

A few minutes later, he showed up groggy at my door. I thanked him and apologized profusely while driving him to his apartment to drop him off. I only ended up being about ten minutes late to work and I didn't catch any guff because I pulled up at exactly the same time as my boss.

I pretty much didn't stop working at all from the time I came in the door until the time I left. As my column on scary job applicants ran, I interviewed a guy who proceeded to tell me he is a convicted child molestor with a smile on his face. While I was fully creeped out from that, one of the few attractive associates I have called and was very friendly and chatty with me. She said she has been reading my column and asked me about my car. I'm definitely interested in spending some time with her and possibly putting my tongue in her mouth. How should I approach this without violating any codes of business ethic?

I don't know if it's because I'm just used to car problems or if it's because it was so damned sunny this afternoon, but I simply wasn't terribly upset. I drove directly to Mr. Bestfriendinthewholewideworld's place from work. After I made sure he packed necessities like nice clothing and condoms for his trip to Vegas, we left to pick up another girl and head out to the airport.

After dropping them off and humping Mr. Bestfriendithewholewideworld goodbye, I hopped back in the car and tuned the radio to the campus station. I got excited because I heard a new Brendan Benson song and more excited when the DJ said she'd be giving away Guided By Voices tickets. When I got home, I picked up the phone to call and ask about the Brendan Benson record, but it just happened she gave me the tickets as well. Although I really want to go to this show, I purchased tickets for Mr. Bestfriendinthewholewideworld to see Ozomatli/Blackalicious/Saul Williams/Karl Denson that night. I thought that putting Jackson's name on the list would be a good way to thank him for letting me borrow his car. He seemed happy when I told him.

Because he's getting half his braces put on at the beginning of next week and he weighs roughly as much as a pair of my underpants, I've been trying to get him to fatten up. We tried to go out to Hometown Buffet so he could gorge himself, but by the time we got our shit together, it was closed. Threats to go to the Cantina or do something fun with our Thursday night were never realized. Weeknights were meant to be boring. Who are we to challenge that?

So today was probably the best day I've ever had that began with my car not starting. It's probably all thanks to this flash animation I found thanks to Elle.

Watch it now. It will change your life almost as much as that Mandy Moore movie.

Almost.

-- Jeffy