05.14.2002 - Rolls Downhill

Even though I made a conscious effort not to, somehow I settled and got comfortable in my job. Although being someone's personal bitch isn't exactly my cup of tea, my boss is rarely in, and the resultant effect is that I spend most of my day sitting in front of a computer reading headline news on the company intranet while being ignored by my coworkers. It isn't ideal, but it pays for the occasional meal.

Today, however, I got reacquainted with the hate and anxiety that made the job seem so overwhelming initially.

Taking a few days off over the last two weeks should have given me a chance to shake off any stress or distaste for my job I may have accumulated in my brief employment. While I should be energized and ready to work, I'm instead perpetually tired. Although some of this lack of energy may be attributed to the fact that going to work is akin to putting on a shirt and tie to get a four to five hour deep rectal examination, a lot of the problem has to do with having to stay up until midnight and wake up at six every morning so I can take my penicillin on time. Normally a rigid sleep schedule makes me feel generally more upbeat, I constantly feel like I need a nap. Unfortunately, leaving a large puddle of drool on my desk and snoring something that sounds vaguely like Blue Swede's Hooked on a Feeling is frowned upon.

When I got to my building, I ambled on up to my desk, fully planning on spending my time opening and closing windows to look busy until quitting time. When I opened my inbox, however, I had a note from my boss letting me know that I would be working on a special project in my other department.

See, I technically work in two departments, though I haven't actually been down to the other since my first week here. The other department is a high pressure environment that doesn't exactly suit me well, and discovering that I'll be spending at least an hour every day down there was a dry heave inducing good time.

My problem mostly stems from the fact that my "supervisor" down there is my boss' administrative assistant. Her executive is particularly demanding and doesn't exactly treat her with respect. Since the "supervisor" doesn't have anyone working under her normally, she takes every opportunity to let the shit slide downhill, so to speak, and be just as demanding and disrespectful to her help. In addition, she got fired from the position I had at my old temp agency before I started working there, and as such, she doesn't like temps and she doesn't like me in particular. If this sounds like a "kick yourself in the balls" kind of party to you, you're on the money.

So I get down there, and she frantically says "I've been so busy doing other things that I haven't been able to do any of my actual work. That's what you get to do today." So basically, anything she was too lazy to do or anything she deemed beneath her gets put on my shoulders. She opened a drawer just crammed with papers and told me to go through them and organize them for filing. As my attempts to make her head explode with mind bullets didn't work, I put on the closest facial expression I have to a non-grimace and walked off to do my work.

After going through roughly a metric ton of accumulated miscellaneous paperwork, I filed it in the nearby cabinet and asked her for my next task. When she asked where I put the papers and I told her that I had filed them, I expected to be patted on the head for working quickly and given a gold star sticker on my forehead. Instead, I suffered a fifteen minute tirade about how if I'm only given one step of a procedure, I should only do that procedure. She made me go through the filing cabinet and pull out the papers I had just taken care of and just organize them for filing like she had asked. When I returned to her desk with the papers organized asking her where she wanted me to place them, she actually laughed at me before sneering and telling me I needed to put them in folders and do it quickly so I could finish it without working overtime.

It took all the strength I had not to flip her off before pulling down my pants and slapping her forcefully in the face with my wang. I'm not sure why, but I fulfilled her request. When I finished, I came back and placed the folders in her desk like she asked. As I started to walk away, she said, "YOU NEED TO SET THOSE IN THERE NEATLY BEFORE YOU LEAVE." Confused as to how what I did wasn't considered neat especially considering they were just jammed in there before, I ignored her and left.

So things should be fun tomorrow.

I have to go home next Wednesday to take care of The Moms after she has surgery, so my plan is to stay at this job until then, at which point I will tell them to smoke it and leave. I should have done this a long time ago.

I spent the rest of my day cooling down from angry, to mildly upset to naptime. I unexpectedly fell asleep on my couch sometime around four o'clock. The nap caused severe grogginess which thankfully cleared up before Gilmore Girls came on.

A while back, I said "I think I actually like Gilmore Girls better than Dawson's Creek now." This is easily the most pathetic thing that has ever crossed my lips.

Even though it shouldn't be, it has been a struggle to stay up until midnight these past few days. If it weren't for bad television and asking Jackson to punch me in the neck, I don't think I'd make it.

Everyone's got a struggle, though.

-- Jeffy